You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
