so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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