Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
