I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
