we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
