Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
