stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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