this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
