somebody snuck up and got me drunk
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
