ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
barbara walters just said penis...
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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