you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
