so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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