I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
