Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
