the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
