I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize