i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Rumble strips road head = magical
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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