It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
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