theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
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