Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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