Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
