Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
