I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize