at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
