I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize