I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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