So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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