Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize