Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize