I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
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