addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Holy shit dude........stairs
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
