It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
