Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
He kissed a someone with a penis
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
