I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
