We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I touched a dick in church today
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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