i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize