Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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