all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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