This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
