Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You should frame my arrest warrant.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize