why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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