Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Randomize
