we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
