I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
