just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Randomize
