She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
