I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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