i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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