I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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