So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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