It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
