I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
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Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
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